Starstukk

Brock found himself in quite a pickle, looking down at an empty ice-cream bowl, and feeling worse instead of better. He watched her get up from the table, his hand once again stowing away into his pocket before he was up and behind her, wrapping his arms protectively around her waist. He nuzzled his nose into her neck, taking deep breaths of her scent to calm himself down. His hold on her tightened protectively.

"Deep breaths, Volchonka." He whispered. "I won't let you fall... and I won't even throw you, this time." He chuckled lightly at his bad joke, humming a soft tune as he placed kisses along her neck. "Deep breaths...."

He paused, hiding his face in her hair and trying to distract himself. "What if you aren't?" He asked. "Taking things the wrong way? What if everything you think is, as always, perfectly correct?" His pocket was starting to burn, but he couldn't... couldn't....

"What if you're right?"

The young girl's breath continued to hitch coming in, in shorter and shorter gasps until she was all but hyperventalating. Her hands shook, and despite every fibre of her being want to do otherwise, she could not relax.

"I-I c-can't," she all but gasped, shaking her head, not entirely sure what it was she couldn't do. She couldn't do so many things. She couldn't calm down, she couldn't keep control, most of all she could breath.

She closed her eyes, and tried to do as she was told, focusing on the arms around her, not on the chaos that was in her mind... or how those arms inadvertently started the chaos. She took on long laboured breath, and then another, both almost painful to her, but it stopped the short jagged ones slightly.

"Then if I-I'm right," she spoke slowly, carefully having to struggle to get the air out of her lungs without returning to her jagged breaths. "If I'm right then w-w-why can't you say it?"

Slowly she wiggled herself around so she was facing him, and proceeded to hid her face into his chest. She couldn't look at him, if she did then everything would start spinning again, and what little control she had gained back was going to disappear once more.

"Please Brock," she said softly, her voice still weak and her breathing just barely in control again. She kept her face were it was, focusing on the sound of his heart below her as she all but begged. "I just... just say it - just once. I Need you to say it just once... once and I'll never ask you to again... I just need to know... please?"

His fingers ran through her hair soothingly as he continued humming, holding her against his chest. His humming stopped abruptly at her request, however, his heartbeat accelerating anxiously. He opened his mouth, his lips forming the words. Easy. Just three little words, and he could keep her forever. He tried... and tried again. His voice wasn't working. He swallowed, trying to force the words out through his suddenly dry mouth, fighting with himself just to say the words. Only one time. Only...

He let out a choked sound, unable to process what was happening with his voice.

Kallie froze where she was for a long moment, her heart up in her throat before it plumeted, like a someone had tied a boulder to it.

He was silent... too silent.

Slowly, she swallowed, forcing herself to look up at him.

"You can't say it can you?" she spoke softly, her jaw clenching as she felt a warmness in her brown eyes that she didn't want to be feeling. "You... can't..."

She swallowed and pulled away from him, turning her face away before he could notice the tears that were starting to drip from her eyes. She wasn't going to cry, certainly not- not over this... not in front of him.

Brock looked down at her, something in her eyes breaking him. He flinched at her words, reaching out for her after she pulled away. "Kallie, Kallie, Nikki, Volchonka, baby, I-I..." He took a few steps forward. "I..." His pocket was nearly blinding him, burning through his skin like fiend fire. "Please, I just-" His voice was shrinking, small, vulnerable. "Don't... please don't leave me."

She closed her eyes at his voice, as he called her name, every name he'd ever.... god she wanted to stop, she wanted to wait, almost did wait but....

Kallie had been waiting for nearly seven years. A girl could only wait so long, take so much...

"We were foolish to ever thing this would work," her voice was small, husky with surpressed sobs. "I can't... you can't..."

"I think," she paused to wipe away the tears that were begining to fall more freely down her face. "It- it would just be easier if we didn't... I'm going to need s-space, for... just space, and-and I don't think I'm coming back this time."

She swallowed as she felt her own words, the truth of them stab her. Gritting her teeth, she couldn't stop the one sob that esacaped her lip before she was running for the door, needing to be out of their before she completely fell appart.

She wasn't sure if he even heard it, if she said it loud enough but she couldn't run out of there without knowing she said it once, the two words meaning almost nothing and yet flinging out of her mouth as she paused at the door. THe last two things she said before disapearing into the hallway.

"I'm Sorry."

"Kallie! Kallie wait I- I can fix this! I can-" His voice choked. "Please, wait, I can- I can-"

She was gone.

Something close to a sob ripped from his chest, his eyes watching the door emptily, sure she'd come back. She had to come back. How was he- He needed- He couldn't-

"Kallie!!" He yelled. "Please! I-" his voice dropped to a whisper. "I love-"

He reached into his pocket, eyeing the small box with something like dispair. "I was gonna-" He couldn't look at it. He didn't want to flick the box open, see the gold band. He couldn't deal with seeing the thing he'd been saving up for since he woke up next to her in the forest.

His fingers tightened over the little box, the urge to throw it, into the wall, into the fire, overtaking him. But he... he couldn't...

With a blank face, he slipped it back into his pocket, ignoring the burn now, almost used to it.

He'd never been worthy of her.